Saturday, April 30, 2005: The city of Houston fell under siege to a bizarre sect known only as LV-426. Heads were turned and jaws were dropped as two strapping young lads of Sutekh took to the streets. No slice of pepperoni pizza was safe. No vintage record shop could run. No 1970s folk horror movie could hide. But lo, musical instrument shops had it the worst by far; for Set’s crazed servants did ecstastically hammer on drums, strum on electric guitars, and scream psalms to His Majesty on microphones turned up to 11 in full public view. Never before had such madness been seen or endured by the community, and the dark wizards soon vanished as mysteriously as they had appeared, like a nightmare before the break of day. No evidence remains of the outlandish lunacies that were witnessed on that fateful Walpurgis Night—not even a photograph.
Walpurgisnacht is on its way! Hooray for the sun, the warmth, and all that’s good and green! And time to pull out some old family favorites, like The Wicker Man, The Devil’s Rain, Leslie Steven’s Incubus, and a shit-ton of Danzig! PRAISE THE GODS!
OK, time for some obscure 1990’s trivia. Are you ready? Shortly after Judas Priest released the album Painkiller in 1990, vocalist Rob Halford left the band. I’ll never forget when he went on MTV years later in 1998 and came out of the closet on live television, finally embracing himself for the strong gay man he truly is. During this period, Halford teamed up with a bunch of different musicians and put out a bunch of different stuff, including an album called Voyeurs by the band 2wo. Have you ever wondered what it might sound like if Rob Halford, the guitarist John 5, and Trent fuckin’ Reznor hammered out a record together? Well, that’s exactly what 2wo’s Voyeurs is. Enjoy!!
Another of my favorite artists is Thomas Gabriel Fischer, the frontman of Hellhammer, Celtic Frost, and Triptykon. Many people cite the British band Venom as being the main inspiration for most black metal, but I would disagree to a certain extent. Certainly Venom started the template, but they were also very humorous and cartoony, which is not something one sees in black metal that often. A more direct line of descent can be drawn from Fischer’s work with his pals in Hellhammer and Celtic Frost, who ran with Venom’s template but replaced all the humor with plenty of cold, wintry, existentialist angst. Fischer’s material with Triptykon is much slower and moodier than Hellhammer or Celtic Frost, and it might very well be my favorite among the artist’s works.
I am doing everything in my power not to let this Sabbat Songs series deteriorate into just a weekly onslaught of cheesy 1980s glam metal videos (because it would be REALLY REALLY EASY for me to just let that happen). But whenever I hear this song by Whitesnake, glam metal is all I want to hear for hours afterwards.
The thrilling conclusion of the Where’s Peanut? Saga is finally here! And Yours Truly appears as the Wrestling Manager at roughly the 14 minute mark. Gotta find that cat!